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Travelogue : Granada | Falling back in love with self

Back in 2017 when I was finishing my degree from an art school

I had a chance to do a solo-trip to Granada, Spain

It was the time I was lost and confused. Big changing point in life. I got to travel and see the world. I went on a date with the guy I adore, met many people and made new friends. Life was at its finest.

However, at the same time It was such a challenge to face so many goodbyes.

Everything happened all at once, it all happened so fast I almost couldn’t follow up with what was happening. The only way out I could think of was to get buy myself some alone time.

Traveling alone sounded like an awesome idea.

My mind was too busy to stay in London and I didn’t want to go home just yet. I wasn’t ready to face the reality.

Granada was a beautiful city. It was like a dream. If heaven was real I believe it would look exactly just like this city.

I was there for about a week. It was the time I got to be with myself and my thoughts. I got to discover some truths of life.

To be completely honest, one of the reasons I got away was because of this one boy I fell in love with back then. Maybe it wasn't love but I liked the idea of it. It was very sweet and all but also very confusing...which is why I wanted to get away. What I got from this trip at the end, I must thank him.

Another reason was that I had this image in my mind all the time due to the research I had to do for my final project at school. We had many references from the south of Spain even though we actually only shot the film in Barcelona and Marca. The image stayed in my mind and I couldn’t get rid of it. So I thought it would be cool if I could go and see it just once with my own eyes.

And so I booked the ticket to the south of Spain right away!

To travel to a place where you don’t speak the language and English is not mainly spoken for me, was a true getaway. Truly alone time.

My favorite motto; I’m not bothering anybody and nobody is bothering me.

I was truly all by myself.

Of course, I had to pre-plan many things before my arrival. Things such as hotels, taxis from the airport and tickets to any historical sites.

I was not concerned about anything else. At the restaurant I would have whatever local dishes they serve. I planned to communicate with people using pictures and easy spanish words written on paper.

Most of my time in Granada I spent walking around the city with no destination. I just kept walking with music in my ears. I remember listening to Air’s Pocket Symphony all day. When I found something interesting I would just stop and stare for a while. If I found any cute local shop I would go check it out and I would get some cold drinks if I found a nice cafe. I kept walking around with no sense of direction in my head. However, I knew I could still use Google Maps and find my way back to the hotel if I got lost.

The only tourist place I plan to see was ‘The Palacio de Generalife’. Other places were just bonuses.

Generalife was only a part of Alhambra which is hugee and you could spend all day walking around.

However, like I have mentioned, I only wanted to see Generalife with my own eyes. I thought that would make me feel fulfilled somehow.

I had no plan to fight with other tourists (to get into anywhere) at all.

I had pre-paid my ticket to Alhambra. It stated clearly in the email to collect the ticket at the entrance at 13:30 with the tour guide and I should be able to just get in.

The funny story was that there were so many people on the day because everybody wanted to see how beautiful it was inside the palace. Everybody was speaking in Spanish! And there were more than just one entrance!

I spend hours walking around looking for a clue of what to do, who to go to and where to get my pre-paid ticket. Obviously I could have just bought a new ticket and got in but I was so angry at myself for not thinking this through. I paid the money, for god’s sake! Why would I pay again?

At the end of the day I gave up. It was a hot day. I was tired. I wanted to cry so bad for the money I paid for nothing. I was so mad at myself.

I decided to go back to the hotel to pull my shit together.

On my way back, I met this old spanish lady who tried to sell me a ‘magic leaf’ (or something like that). I knew it was a scam. But I couldn't be bothered so I gave her some changes I had.

I thought to myself that it was such a bad day and couldn’t get any worse.

Until I kept walking and I realised the bushes on my left and right side had the exact same ‘magic leaf’ I bought from the old lady!

Whatever...It was not my day.

I made it back to the hotel.

What a shitty day, I thought.

I laid on my bed and thought about what happened on that day.

I decided to myself I had to go back and see the Generalife with my own eyes the next day. I had to. I have already put my mind to it so I must complete the mission!

And I didn’t know when would be the next time I get to visit Granada again. I just had to see it.

On the 19th of July 2017.

I got up at 6 in the morning and went straight to Alhambra from my hotel. I was super early and was the first of the day to get the ticket…

I was the first person to get in to see the palace on that day!

Of course the Generalife was my first stop.

On my way to the Generalife, there was no one around me. What an amazing time it was.

It was like I was in this dream...the dream I had. The one I got to follow my desire to come and see this place with my own eyes. The dream where I was surrounded by beautiful flowers. The morning light was so soft and comforting. It was crazy and I couldn’t believe it was real.

And there I was.

I was standing there, looking at the very same image I couldn’t get out of my mind. It was so beautiful, just like I had imagined.

What was in front of me and what was in my mind finally matched each other. It looked just like in a book, on the research. It was like a dream.

But It was real. Couldn’t be more real than this. I got to see it, touch it, feel it and smell this place.

I made it there. I made it to where I wanted to be.

And for the first time in a very long time, I fell in love with myself again. I was lost and confused but I finally found her. I found myself. I found me.

At that moment I realised that nothing else matters. Whatever that was on my mind before was not a big deal at all. I was good and everything was fine.

That trip to Granada made me realise what I really wanted (still want as of 2021). What is the most important thing of all is to follow my passion and dream. Do what I believe and believe in what I do.

When the time comes, It will be worth it.

There might be some bitter obstacles along the way,

but in the end I can guarantee it will be a damn sweet gift of life.

19 July 2021



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